Dear Jared.

Sorry if my last blog kinda bring you back to the place that you had forgotten where i sometimes am. Troubled place.

Good morning if you are in New York or Los Angeles.

I watched The Outsider at Netflix today.

And then i realised how much i missed you. Your love in particular. You chose someone who is my height in that movie.

I know you have always loved me. Only thing is i myself pushed it away because i can no longer withstand this distance between us. I always knew you loved me.

Maybe i shouldnt talk it anymore because you are always with Valery. I kinda pity her compare to all the girls you had been within this 11 or 12 years or thousands years we had been together as "i dont know what to describe"...

You had been with so many girls that i begin to not trust my feelings of you anymore.

Even though my gut still believe, that if i were to come back as before, you would accept me like nothing has happened. Because you loved me.

No matter how many girls you had been with, none of them can beat me in winning your heart. It was mine. And always will be mine. Whether i am there or not.

Unless you had fallen in love with someone else, then i had loose you for sure.

But i dont feel that. I feel....you are still waiting for me.

And your heart just can't let me go unless we have met, and you found something hateful about me...and then you could let me go.

I havent forgotten your love. I just froze myself from feeling it.

What do you want me to do, Jared? Move on and forget you? Since this relationship is not going anyway?

I have froze my feelings for you.because what is the point?

Have you given up on me?

Do you believe there is no hope for us?

Those fantasies and dreams that i had about meeting you at Venice beach and pier, its pointless if you had given up on me.

Those are not just empty dreams or just fantasies. I really do believe one day it could happened.

That i could go Venice beach and Malibu beach and the pier and we could bump into each other.

But i cannot proceed with my dreams if you have someone by your side.

Give me a reason to believe that there is something here.

Jared, if there is isnt anything more, please announce your relationship with Valery. Because thats mean i can be free.

All the rest before, they did that. They leave me for someone else.

Feeling awful at first but i feel free afterward....to move on and give my love to someone else.

Do i want to give my Love to someone else? For now....No.

Because for now....its yours...it had been since 2008.

Its ok....you can wait until i die, then decide if this is for real or not.

Can you bear it knowing i had died and you didnt get to spend a day with me?

You really believe i am going to live forever, dont you?

You know.....that Love...that you had for me, even if you live a thousand years and meet a million girls, you know you can never meet anyone like me.

You know that,right?

The one and only, Sabariah.

Why am i talking about death? Even though you know i wont do anything stupid. but what they did to me, is making my body dying. My spirit is strong. But my body is not.

So i am afraid, if i might have to go, before we get to meet again. My Love.

Yours sincerely, till the end.

Sabariah 💋

Sorry. I have been busy.

 to jared.

Hi Handsome. You actually did shaved your beard for a part in "WeCrashed" mini series..? Nice. I thought it was an old picture. Because you looked tbe same like you were 300 years ago. 😄

And of course Hail to the victor video was out. Nice too. 7 millions already. In 3days... My video has 13 views since 2 months ago. Should i envy you..? No. Because your video is pro work. Mine is problem work. 😁 so i totally understand the success.

Anyway....sorry. for writing so late. I have been busy with other things too. I am starting a business again.

Again?.Yeah i know. Like the 5th time since we know each other. There was Carousell, and shopify, and maryKay and booth sale...foodstall. you named it, i have tried it.

Its a bust. But i still want to do it.

Now...its Print on demand and selling printed painting

But because now i am launching a Print on demand tshirt and stickers at Shopify. Again at shopify. Haven't launched yet. Maybe tomorrow. The lastday of trial.

And i already started my Redbubble shop.

I really like being in business.

I am super excited about dropshipping and online business.

Because i am a  introvert by nature. Became extrovert by force to make a living.

I craved for the time i don't have to go outside my house. just do work from home and quietly became a millionaire.

I don't need for people to know i am rich or is that I am ArtbrushImpact famous shop's owner at Redbubble.

I can live with people not knowing that i have i a bungalow in Los Angeles. 3 semidetached houses and 3 condominium houses in Singapore. And 2 beach houses in Jeju ISLAND South Korea.

I can live with people not knowing how filthy rich i am. 😜 😀😄😄😆☺.

Thats why i really like doing this online business. The invisibility of it.

I love it.

Did you missed me when i wasn't around?

I don't know how to tell you this without making you feel guilty even when it is not your fault.

But i am going to fixed it somehow.....Magically.

I haven't been sleepwalking for 28 days as of 10days ago. Give and take. And then i wrote to you.

And it started again. And those criminals is overjoy.

This time i have no choice.

I have to asked from my Moon Goddess and God Sun. To stopped them from raping and selling me.

In that 28 days that it stopped..i know they have seek vodoo people to make me sleepwalk again.

So....they played dirty game to gained money if i sleepwalk.

And you know how angry i am when they sell and raped me.

This time i am fighting with magic again.

They played dirty. I am afraid i am going to play dirtier.

Until one day they will leave me and my family alone.

I am a Witch. I don't need to see vodoo-you-do people to do magical stuff. I can do it myself.

Only thing is, i always do not want to do magic.

But then, they raped me again. And sell me again. I have stopped sleepwalking.but they did spells to make me sleepwalking again. So they can make money.

Now....i am not stopping myself again.

I too will do magic. Maybe 2 times a week or 3 times. Until i get the results i want.

Which is to make them so frightened of me that they will leave Me and my family alone.

Watch me.

Thats why i have been quiet.

I was doing spells....

They won't leave me alone willingly. I have to teach them a lesson that They will never forget.

Its not your faults.

Maybe its their doing too. The more i talked to you the more I sleepwalk.

If its true its their doing......watch out.

I can't wait for Karma anymore.

So...thats why i was quiet.

When i talked to you the last time i didn't sleepwalk for 28 days. And then they did a spell on me.

I am going to get back at them.

Being nice is sucks.

Its time i become who i really am.

A Witch.

If you love me like a friend, wait for me until i calms down and can talk like a human.

At this moment, i feel like a Witch...with capital B.

So, just wait a while more.

I need to teach these people a lesson.

Love, your friend, past girlfriend, inactive girlfriend,

Or whatever.....😝😘

💋 Sabariah

You must be waiting.

 Hey Baby.

When I said look for me at Winterwander60, you must be looking. Hope you understood what it meant and looked for my blog.

I know you missed me.

I know you wanted me to talk. I know you wanted to hear from me.

But then how was I able to talked to you? Twitter banned me because they didn't realised I was joking. They didn't get it then they banned me. Which is fine to me.

I can't write at Facebook because I have friends there. My business is put there. So I can't directly speak with you.

So...I hope you found this blog because only here I can talked to you, I guess.

Show a sign that you got this message. Like posting "XOXO🖤🖤"...so I know you read this blog.

It will motivate me to write everyday.

That's it for now.

Love 🖤

Sabariah.

I missed you too.

 I can't write at Twitter. And I can't write at Facebook. But I know you have missed me.

What am I supposed to do?

Every time I wrote to you or even think about you, I get sick. I sleepwalk.

Sometimes I stopped and I don't know why. And I was happy. But I started thinking about you again and send you a message, and then I got sick.

I am not making up stories.

I missed you so much. But I had to pretend I don't missed or think about you.

Just so I don't sleepwalked.

It's a curse on my part.

Maybe I am not supposed to be with you.

Even from far away.

Love...

Your Owl.